I cleared my head today and found new letters waiting for me to write. Here’s a new one for you all. This one’s interactive. Make it your own. Enjoy!

No. 9

To (insert name, noun, or meaning here),

Here it is. Here you are, (insert name, noun meaning here) , in my letters. I wanted to keep you out, but as always, you’ve resurfaced. You urged me not to leave anything out, to be fearless with my words, to say what I want and give no thought to what anyone thinks, to express everything I’m thinking, to mean what I say and say what I mean. But, when it comes to (name, noun, meaning),I found myself in a constant state of confusion. Confused about what to say, how to say it, what to ask, what not to ask, what to leave unsaid, and so, I held myself at a loss for words.

Then there was a revelation, or maybe it is more of a resolution, personal clarity, a clearing in the trees that started to grow too tall in my head. The whole thing, the back and forth, the uncertainty surrounding you, was part of the process—my process of discovery and growth. Which, in retrospect, you catalyzed. (Insert name, noun, meaning), you were the flint that started a fire which burned out all the old thought patterns, angles of approach and self-doubt in that forest in my head. You allowed me to begin to see me.

More than seeing myself and dealing with all these foreign things you made me feel, I realized that you, (insert name, noun, meaning) , were a part of the equation as much as I was. So, I want to say the thing I always forgot, the thing that constantly slipped my mind, but the thing I intended and meant to tell you all along.

You, (insert name, noun meaning), are a powerful, intense, and beautiful thing. Maybe your blinders are on too often, like mine were. You don’t even realize it. But, you affect everything you come into contact with–whether it is a noun, a verb, or an idea that you are dealing with—you affect everything, as you affected me. I thank you for letting me to see this in you, even if you cannot, because I now see it in myself.

I only ask that you let yourself be as uninhibited and aware as you allowed me to be.

-A.L.

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